scheduling is hard work: how to not make it harder

scheduling is hard work.

twice during january, i was in live conversations where a group of 5+ people where trying to schedule something. at one point during both conversations almost everyone in them was big e Exasperated.

the first time it made me realize something and the second time confirmed it: i think many of us have unstated and unrealistic assumptions about our time. in both conversations, the groups were trying to schedule recurring meetings for 3+ months. unsurprisingly (to me at least), it was difficult. what was surprising to me was how frustrated everyone got at the difficulty. the first time it happened i facilitating and took some moments to get up on my soapbox:

we all live very full lives. the work of scheduling regular time with each other is hard. for most of us, our time is broken up into many blocks of time a day. and if each of us is making free decisions about how to use that time, the work of finding the places where *all of us have open space has just got to be hard work. also, we undervalue administrative/logistical work as a society so many of us have relatively low tolerance for it. we just expect it to all come together after one attempt and thatā€™s just not reality. however, when epic people (like the ones in this room) put in the effort to align their time so that they can be together on a regular basis, weā€™re creating the possibility for bigger things to happen with all of our powers combined. itā€™s hard work and frustrating at times, but itā€™s worth it!*

since i that lil soliloquy, i have seen the frustration arise in group after group, by text, by email, during in-person meetings, and online ones. now that i can see it, i canā€™t unsee it.

and i get it. it is annoying for scheduling to be so hard. but i think the world where scheduling isnā€™t difficult is one thatā€™s pretty different than the one we live in.

village culture/life where things just flow as they flow sounds nice.

or even if we didnā€™t live village life, it would be dreamy to have lives where our time isnā€™t shredded into a million tiny blocks. but it is because (a) we live in clock time (how much do you know/think about life before clocks?) and (b) we have to do all the things we need and have to do to keep afloat. maybe if we had better collective systems/infrastructure, things would be different. maybe universal healthcare, universal basic income, robust community care systems, and decommodified housing (etc etc) could get us to a way of being where we donā€™t have to work to afford to live and then try to fit our family/community/childcare/social lives in between.

but til thenā€¦ scheduling will be hard work. idk. is what it is. i find that if i can acknowledge it and let it be, things are more easeful than when i rail against it. scheduling can be painfulā€¦ but as the oft said line goes:

pain is inevitable; suffering is optional. ā€” anonymous

ps - also, after i wrote this i realized i have a semi-frequent experience of someone saying ā€œiā€™m totally flexible! just pick a time and iā€™m sure itā€™ll work.ā€ and then i pick a time and the time doesnā€™t work. i think many people really want to have a flexible and free life but that is not actually true and there is a big resistance to that acknowledgement. ĀÆ\_(惄)_/ĀÆ


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