mentoring: the best way to learn. also the best to know your place in a community and feel like you belong

14 Jul 2017

the best way to grow is to have teachers, peers, and people you teach. — gibrán rivera, evolutionary leadership

my translation? the best way to grow is to have people you are learning from, people you are learning with, and people who are learning from you.

you always have something to learn from those wiser and more experience than you. there are always people who are in a similar life stage as you and learning with them can be safe and also provide space for experimentation and co-learning. and there are always people who can learn from the things you know and have experienced.

it’s important to be in relationship with all three groups of people.

in my life, i know lots of people who have relationships with one, maybe even two of those groups. rarely do i find another person who has access to all three. i think it’s important to get access to all three. not in a fake, way, but, over time, these things can be quite natural, even when they were intentional or strategic up front.

having access to all three is not only important for your own growth, it also is important to your sense of belonging.

knowing that there are people you can trust to see you (deep seeing, not visual seeing) over time creates a feeling of being held.

knowing that there are people you are learning with creates a feeling of safety, experimentation, and expectation. this, to me, feels like the “hey, i remember how you were talking about taking this job was going to impact you… how’s it going?” moments.

and lastly, knowing that there are people you are entrusted with supporting, creates an anchor of belonging (not that the other two groups don’t, but it’s different). to be blunt, it makes one feel important and valuable.

so, yes to what g said. “the best way to grow is to have teachers, peers, and people you teach.”

random quote on the importance of being mentored

The crowd is wrong. The critics are wrong. Useful feedback is precious.

Is there someone smarter than you regularly giving you generous feedback?

Do they understand where you’re going and what change you’re trying to make in the world?

If they don’t care enough to know that, how can they possibly help you get there? — seth godin, altmba blog

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