self-mastery: my love languages

last week as i was doing more work to prep for the upcoming nine months of the formation project, i took a step i’ve been meaning to take for years: i finally took the love languages quiz!

i knew my top ones mostly because i try to be pretty observant of my habits and patterns, but it was nice to actually take the damn thing.

here are my (if you know me, unsurprising) results:

11 physical touch
10 quality time
6 words of affirmation
3 acts of service
0 receiving gifts

i’ve always known physical touch is important to me (which is why hugging is so important in my life). i hadn’t thought about quality time being up there so high, but i know it’s true. i SO much more care about spending 1on1 time with people i love than group hangouts or parties. group social time can be fun, but it doesn’t count for me as quality time.

i could write about this stuff for a while, but i think the last thought i’ll share is that it’s funny to see receiving gifts at 0. that feels accurate, but i wonder what that’s about. maybe it’s fully natural (whatever that means in this context)… could it also be connected to me being socialized as a man in a system where men are taught “self”-sufficiency and rugged individualism?


words / writing / post-processing
220w / 10min / 5min