alternative futures: centerhold

morning pages - oct 19, 2025 @ 515a

jayden, the eldest youth on the land right now and next to go through initiation, woke me up last night at 3am. he shook me from my sleep and told me something had gone wrong with the fire from ceremony. we got it all squared away, but it was jarring for sure. next time, i need to make clearer instructions for visitors who are going to stay up past lights out.

i am grateful for jayden’s presense here. he’s 15 and bursting at his spiritual seams. he is learning to centerhold very well. he struggles a bit with stepping into the role and out of it when he needs to, but when he’s in it he shines. it is hard to believe he’s already been here for a year.

later this morning we will see the weekend visitors off and start putting the fields to sleep. we’ve got to get the cover crop planted and make sure all the seed garlic is ready to go in next month.

the boston movement elder circle is coming for a day trip on wednesday. i’ve got to make sure all their materials they’ll need to hold their rituals are ready. maybe i’ll ask jayden if he wants to grab asa, alvie, and nico and take them through the southern forest path to pick whatever medicines are ready right now. i spoke with nisha last week and it seems they have been holding a lot of the chaos of the ripples of the #defundthefoundations work. i am glad this land is ready to hold it and them all.

ah, that reminds me i need to make sure to check in with leo so we can finalize the acceptances for the winter fellowship. we have 174 applications for 20 spots! it seems the word has gotten out and sadly we’re not building out our lodging fast enough to keep up. not that we’ll ever be able to keep up, but we haven’t yet found enough sister centers to direct people when our program is at capacity. even with all the centers popping up in the region and all over turtle island, it’s still not enough to meet the demand. as the electoral system falls apart, peoples hearts are breaking and their eyes are opening to this third way we’re stewarding.

my big question for the week is can i find enough time to be still to hear what the land is wanting regarding our newest construction project. we know we need to expand our permanent housing from 3 units to 6 in 2026. the first three tiny houses were easy. the main hall was already here. and the first dorm was pretty straightforward. but now that the draught is intensifying and our funders are even more excited to support us, it’s getting really tricky to think about where to put buildings to double our permanent housing. maybe i can take wednesday off and walk the land…

anyway, it’s almost 6 and i need to get the rest of my morning ritual underway so i can polish off the next chapter in our latest book. i’m so grateful writing has become a part of how we make this place function. what a gift!

thank you, Spirit and ancestors and all beings, for the gift of this day. may i be as present today as all the enlightened ones.

words / writing / post-processing
559w / 25min / 2min